It happened instantly – infatuation
It developed over time – love
I can’t even stand to be near him because I get all giddy and dumb-founded – infatuation
I’m most comfortable around him and could spend the whole day just talking to him – love
The longer I stay with him, the weaker my feelings for him – infatuation
The longer I stay with him, the stronger my feelings for him – love
When we have a disagreement I’m scared of hashing it out because it might lead to a break up – infatuation
When we have a disagreement I’m willing to talk it out because I know our relationship will survive – love
I seem to be the one who does everything in the relationship (call him, organize for dates) and go out of my way to please him – infatuation
We have a give and take relationship and when I feel he’s not doing his part I can talk to him without fear of our relationship disintegrating – love
We have more sex than we talk – infatuation
Our relationship is much more than a physical relationship. We could spend a whole night just talking about our hopes and dreams and still feel fulfilled – love
What’s your criteria for love?
I’m currently writing ‘Don’t Say No’ a story about two people reliving a past love and I say write it I can’t help but wonder, does forever love really exist?
A lot of us have experienced a deep kind of love where you were willing to give your all for that one person. Where you thought they were going to be forever and would never hurt you. Then something happened. You found out a secret, someone cheated, a mother-in-law was horrible, In ‘Don’t Say No’ it’s a case of being walked out on right when you need that person most. Things happened and you broke up. But despite the stars being swiped away from your heart, you can’t let go. You don’t trust that person but you love them.
Therein lies the problem.
Can you love one person for the rest of your life despite all the crap they put you through? Or does the love go away when they’re no longer the shiny jewel you thought they were? I don’t think is does, because I’ve seen a lot of people going back to past loves, even when they don’t trust them, just because that deep connection is still there. We hope that person will change.
Sometimes they do, sometime they don’t.
Even when the situation doesn’t get better some part of you still remains vulnerable to them, hoping for that change. Is it because we’re stupid people who are too optimistic or are we a slave to that mythical forever kind of love. Like a drug it addicts and enslaves until even if you know that someone is bad for you, you keep going back for more.
Too bad no one’s come up with a Love Rehab Center
So what do you do when you’re enslaved by a bad kind of forever love? Stay with it and risk even more hurt? Replace it? From my experience it is hard to find someone else who gives you that same ‘high’ who makes you feel as deeply as that one person did. Does it mean that because the love isn’t so powerful this time, you’ve settled? Or do you just keeping searching with the risk that you’ll never find it and be too old for any kind of love when you realize it.